Bobo is Back!

My Aunt Theresa has a way with kids. She is loving and attentive and my kids adore her. Asher will go to her even when he hasn't seen her in months and that is a big deal for my little stranger danger guy. Izzy loves Aunt T for lots of reasons, but I am sure there is one major one. When she sees the kids it is like there is no one else around. She plays whatever they want to play for however long. Aunt T asked if Izzy wanted to spend the night Friday and that is all he could think about last week. I am sure the week felt like forever since he still doesn't know his days of the week in order. Friday finally came and off Izzy went. I got a call on Saturday morning from a very happy boy who asked if he could stay another day because he was simply having too much fun. I agreed, but I have to admit I was a little sad he didn't miss us more. =) On Sunday afternoon Aunt T brought Izzy home and he was so excited to see what we had done while he was gone. We put up the Christmas lights and I surprised him by putting up his Christmas tree in his room (minus the breakable ornaments thanks to Asher). I am pretty sure that is the only reason he decided to come home because he told me his weekend was full. They went shopping, to Chuck E. Cheese, McDonald's, watched movies and ate popcorn, played with Jack (Izzy's shi-tzu who Aunt T graciously took after many scratches on baby Asher) and stayed up late every night and didn't take a single nap. A kids dream!

He talked about Aunt Theresa all night long and asked when the next time he could visit her. I am so happy he has someone who just loves on him and makes him feel so special. Sometimes you just need a place to get spoiled rotten. For Mommy it is the spa...for Izzy it is Aunt Theresa's!

Thanks.

Today I am purposing to be positive and thankful. I try to do this each and every day, but today more than normal. Sunday was an emotional day for me, and I let myself have those times every once and a while, but it is a new day and it is time to refocus. So, here is a list of a few things I am so thankful for.

1. Hubby. He was made just for me, my perfect balance and I can't imagine a single day without him.

2. Judah. I am thankful for every single second with that baby. I am thankful that he made me a mother when we weren't sure I would ever get to experience that. I am thankful that I can close my eyes and still smell his baby smell and hear his sweet gurgles.

3. Israel. I am thankful that he gave me a new life and taught me to love again. I am so grateful for his sweetness. Every single day he fills my heart with his sweet sayings and affection. He always senses exactly what I need and when I need it.

4. Asher. I am thankful for the joy and laughter he brings to our family. You can't help but smile when you look at that beautiful baby and he will do anything for a laugh. I am thankful for all of the cuddles and baby time he has given me, and this time I am soaking every minute of it up.

5. Family. I have the best family. Kind, giving, loving and faithful.

6. Friends. I am blessed to have a group of close friends who make me laugh uncontrollably and will cry with me when I need it.

7. Time. Sometimes, I forget what I have been through the last few years. I get busy and focused on the daily tasks and forget that this could have had a very different ending. I am so thankful for time with my children to watch them grow to young men.

8. Health. In the last 7 years I have had multiple surgeries and a life threatening infection. I am so blessed to be alive, healthy and able to care for my family. Two years ago last month, I wrote a letter to Israel because I was not sure if I would get to see him grow up and I am so thankful that letter is still in my safe. =)

And now for the little things...

9. Sleep. I am thankful to have 2 good sleeping boys.

10. My camera. I am so happy to have a great camera to capture the daily moments I share with my babies. My mind can only hold so many memories...but my camera can get everything.

11. Facebook. For without it, I wouldn't have time to keep up with my friends and family. It is pretty much impossible to have a phone conversation with 2 little ones hanging on your leg. And lets be real...I was never good on the phone anyway.

12. My wonderful parents who give my hubby and I a chance to reconnect whenever his schedule permits.

13. Foodnetwork.com because without it, we would be eating grilled cheese every night.

14. DVR- Oh how I love you!!! This invention has made it possible for me to keep my kids happy by recording family movies and their favorite: Max and Ruby! But even better, it keeps me happy by recording all of my shows that I am too busy to watch otherwise and I get to skip all of the commercials!!!

15. Antibacterial gel- How did people even survive without it?

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!!

The Truth Hurts.

The truth from a Mommy who has buried her child.

Time does not heal all wounds.

In fact, it is just the opposite. Each day that passes, it becomes a little more difficult to breathe. As each holiday approaches you are slammed with the thought that once again you are celebrating as a family, but your whole family is not here. I have one less child to buy a Tonka Truck for and I notice the empty space in the Christmas photos. Each year as I buy presents for Israel, I think would Judah have liked this? What would he have been interested in? Judah would be 5 years old this year and I can't even imagine what Christmas would feel like with him here. To look in my rear view mirror and see 3 smiling faces looking back at me is something I think about every day.

People with the sincerest of hearts often have said that because I have been so miraculously blessed with two more precious gifts that I should be able to have a full heart and move on. It simply doesn't work that way. Having more children does not erase the pain and heartache of losing a child. My boys bring me a joy that I didn't think I would ever feel again. I laugh every single day and if you would have asked me 5 years ago, I didn't know how I could feel true happiness again. Truth be told, there is a part of my heart that is empty until I hold him again. I am incomplete.

Every single day, I wake up and make a choice. I have to. If I went purely by my heart, I would have never breathed a single breath again. The overwhelming pain and crushing weight on my heart knowing I won't see him grow, get another kiss, hear him say Mama or take him to his first day of school is too enormous for a human to handle. Instead I have faith. I have faith that we will be reunited in heaven. That he is, at this moment, praising God in a way I have yet to experience. That in heaven, he is in perfect form and without pain and that is exactly what every mother wants.

The holidays are rapidly approaching and I can feel my heart tensing. I feel like at any minute my emotions will erupt and I am not sure when it will stop. Today is one of those days where I have to make the choice to be joyful and thankful a little more often. To remind myself of all the things I have been given, not just the one that was taken away. Today is one of those days, I pray the morning comes soon, so I can hug my sweet boys and tell them I love them.

From a mommy who has buried her child, the truth is, it hurts. No matter the time, the size of the family, the amount of time spent with your child, just no matter...it still hurts.

Potty Party!

This week Izzy made a huge accomplishment. He no longer needs pull-ups when sleeping!!!! When potty training Izzy at 2, I asked my Pediatrician her opinion on cold turkey training (no pull-ups at all or allow them for sleep times until he is dry on his own). Her response was to allow his body to direct the timing, as most children don't develop the ability to hold for a full night of sleep until 5 years of age. Izzy has been dry at nap time for a couple of months, but I continued to let him wear them because I didn't want him to get upset at himself if he was to have an accident. Tuesday we ran out of pull-ups and I decided what better time to test it out than now? He took at 3 hour nap and woke up dry and completely proud of himself!!! I told him I would have a big surprise for him being such a big boy.

The next day while he was at school, I decorated his room with 100 balloons and home made signs. I bought an army toy kit complete with a compass, binoculars, head set, badge, and helmet to reward his success. I had his whole room decorated and ready and Grandma and Asher were waiting there to surprise him. When I picked him up, I told him I had a surprise for him and he opened his bedroom door and squealed in delight!!! His very own POTTY PARTY!!! We celebrated and played with balloons and his new toy. He told me over and over, "thank you Mommy for giving me a special day. This is the coolest!"

I think the biggest lesson I have learned from being a Mommy, is making a kid feel happy and special costs almost nothing, but a little time. I spent $3 and I think that day is something he will always remember. Who wouldn't like to wake up to a room full of balloons? A sure way to wake up happy!!!

Lysol take me away...

Mommy Confession. I HATE MUCUS. Like hate it where I turn into Kate Gosselin in the Disney World/Ice Cream episode. Every time my kids sneeze, I cringe. Today before 8:30 there were so many sneezes, I lost count. But something I can count is the number of shirt changes and that was 2. TWO changes of clothes before 9 because of mucus explosions. I went on a crazy cleaning frenzy yesterday hoping to feel a little better and it only made me tired. I have come to the conclusion that I will only feel better in a couple of days when the boys are better and one hand has a can of Lysol and the other is holding the Clorox wipes. I was keeping a running list in my head of all of the toys my boys had played with this weekend, but at this point every single item in Izzy's room is getting a bleach bath. That is like extra credit for a germaphobe like me.

On a side note... (and this may get me punched in the face by my friends)

Most babies at Ashers age are caught trying to crawl out of their cribs. Yesterday, I walk in his bedroom to find Asher stuck on the railing trying to crawl INTO his crib. He was so relieved to see me so I could offer him some assistance. It was one of those moments I wish I had my camera handy. Izzy was this way too as a baby. He would walk into his room at the same time every single day grab his blankie from his bed and bring it to me..that meant he was ready for a nap. Asher is a little more independent so I guess he thought he would just cut out the middle man.


I feel like now is the appropriate time to say this.
To all the people who told me to "just wait" because there was NO WAY I could have 2 calm, happy babies that are also amazing sleepers.... Commence Hating!


Happy Monday!

Reduce. Reuse. Recycle

I have noticed a growing trend around the house lately. Both of my boys have started a new habit of organizing things by group and finding a special place to store the items. Asher seems to concentrate on food items. During meal times, he groups like food together and puts them in certain sections of his tray. If he doesn't want to eat something, he (very sneakily) leans forward and drops the item behind his back and then proceeds to finish the rest of the food. By the time, I go to clean him up, I am so proud at how much food he has eaten and then I take him out only to find that 98% of the food has been stored on his back and not only is his high chair a mess, but his clothes have food smashed into them. Note: It is never fun to start the day with a very clean and newly dressed baby, just to have to completely change and re-bathe said baby because he stores food like a squirrel. The other odd thing about this is, he doesn't like when you get rid of the food. He really is storing it for a later date. I have found random snacks placed in secret hiding spots around the house. When he gets hungry, he goes to his secret food stash and returns with a giant smile and the random food such as an animal cracker. I am constantly taking his stored food away from him. I have never heard of a baby doing this before.

Then there is Izzy. He is all about re-purposing items. This week, he found a large empty almond container and asked if I could wash it so he could have it. I did and within a few minutes he returned with a container full of hot wheels. He was so proud that he had recycled the container. The next day, we got a couple of packages in the mail. He was playing quietly in his room and when I checked on him I couldn't believe my eyes. He had filled the large empty box with literally every toy in his bedroom. He filled it and was dragging the what had to be 20 lb box around behind him. I am not really sure why he does this, but he likes boxes, bags, containers and he likes to fill them with specific items that for that day are special to him.

Here is the other thing about Izzy. When he learns something new, he becomes a little obsessed about it. Take hand washing and germs. I am surprised he even has skin left on his poor little hands. He has becoming relentless about hand washing since his school promoted it and taught about the dangers of flu and germs. Well, it shouldn't surprise me, but I guess the newest discussions have been about recycling. He has informed me I am not allowed to throw trash on the ground outside because it hurts the earth and kills animals. As much as I appreciate the enthusiasm, I do not want to have to keep every empty Velveeta container so that he can fill it with pencils or army men!

I think I am going to have to nip this new hobby in the bud. I don't want to be the next family on that show Hoarders.

Prayer

Everyday on the drive to school, Izzy and I pray. Izzy normally prays first and it is always very sweet. Then he asks me to pray for him and I do.

My prayer normally goes something like this:

Dear Jesus, Thank you for this beautiful day. Thank you for Israel and Asher because they are such blessings. I pray you keep them safe from harm and protect them from evil. That you would give them peace in their bodies and minds and give Izzy focus and attention at school. I pray that Israel would have favor with his teachers and friends that they would enjoy him today. Give Israel kind words in his mouth, patience, and an obedient spirit. In Jesus name, Amen!

Israel has become amazing at praying. He is very sensitive and sometimes the things that come out of his mouth during prayer time just blow me away! Today was one of those days.

On the way to school today, he said, "Mommy, I am going to pray. Dear Jesus, Thank you for my friends and family. Please help me to have kind words and be a good friend. Help me to have peace in my body and help Ashie feel better. God I pray you help Joseph to be kind and loving and teach him to be a good friend. Protect our car so we don't wreck and help Mommy and Ashie to have a good day today and not miss me too much while I am gone. In Jesus Name, Amen!

Now the last couple of days, he has been praying for Joseph, so I assumed he was praying for a kid at school that maybe was having a hard time. Today I finally asked. "Izzy who is Joseph? Is he a friend in your class?" He replied, " No, Mommy. Joseph is Jesus' friend. He is in the Bible didn't you know that? Jesus' friends should be nice to him too, just like my friends are to me. So I have to pray for Joseph that he will have kind words for Jesus."

Touché

Izzy's Quote of the Day

"Mommy, I'm thirngry."

Me- " Uh, what?"

"I'm thirsty and hungry...you know I'm thirngry."

Day 2

Yesterday I posted about starting the South Beach Diet again and complained about how hard it is. I am going to shut up now, because on Day 2 weigh in, I have already lost 2 1/2 pounds.

YAY South Beach!!! =)

Surgeries, Babies and Bad Habits

All the things that made me gain weight, but mostly the latter. Spring this year, Hubby and I decided to get back to our healthy weights and decided the South Beach Diet was the way to go. It totally worked. Hubby and I both lost 30+ pounds within about 3 months. We hit our first goal and kind of slacked off and enjoyed the rest of the summer.

Which brings us to today. We went on lock down. South Beach Phase 1 all over again. We are both determined to get to our final goal weight and for both of us that is about 15 pounds. Shouldn't be hard if we stick with the plan.

Lets review day 1.

I didn't cheat one time, not even a bite. However, I was so busy today I didn't stick to the meal times and actually skipped 3 meals. You are supposed to eat every 3 hours, and I only ate breakfast. Oops! By the time I was eating dinner, I felt like I was going to puke. I could barely eat even though that is exactly what I needed. To summarize Phase 1, we are allowed lean meats, low-fat dairy, nuts and veggies. We are NOT allowed my favorite things which include fruits and all carbs. ALL CARBS! (That was me yelling), for 2 weeks. I will be so thankful for phase 2 which starts week 3 because we can add in 1 whole grain and 1 fruit each day. I am a bread and sweets lover, which is obviously why I am in this predicament in the first place. The first two weeks is killer, you feel like it is never going to end and you just want to go to bed early every night so you can avoid temptation. As I am writing this, my stomach is begging for literally anything. A morsel of anything that isn't a leaf. It will get a little easier in a couple of days. I will be used to eating like this and I will sail through the rest of it, but until then. Every minute I am not busy I am thinking I might just go in to the pantry and stuff a tortilla in my mouth. I believe that is called desperation.

I will be so happy though when I stick to it, and 2 weeks from now I will have lost a dramatic amount of weight. I think the first time we did this, I lost almost 10 pounds in the first 2 weeks.

When you pray tonight..pray for will power for me. I can't stop remembering that my Dad spent $50 on halloween candy and it is stashed in the house. Or that Hubby bought super yummy salsa and I just really want some salty chips and salsa right about now.

Hopefully, in a couple of weeks I can post a picture of how hot I look and then all of this stomach pain and dizziness will have been worth it. =)

Teething bites!

Asher is 17 months old today!!!! To celebrate this he slept 14 hours straight! I like that kind of party!!

About a month ago, we all got really sick. Asher had a viral infection and it took about 10 days for him to get completely over it. He didn't sleep well during that time at all and I had to rock or pat him to sleep at every nap and bedtime. That is very unusual because he puts himself to sleep every day. Now it is a month later and the habits have continued except the last couple of weeks he has been waking up at 2,3,4,5,6 and sometimes staying up from 4 in the morning. This makes for a very cranky mommy. 16 months old, we should have no problem going to sleep and staying asleep. Finally, it hit me when he wouldn't take a sippy anymore. He must be getting his last teeth in. If he saw me pour anything in his sippys he dropped in hysteria. Asher is not at all attached to a bottle, he only wants what is in there no matter how I serve it. Finally, this weekend, I put it all together and gave him a little motrin before bed, and what happened but 14 hours of straight sleep!!!!!

Normally, it doesn't take me so long to put the puzzle together, but the sickness threw me off. I figured he just got into a habit of me helping him go to sleep and was just being difficult now.

Either way, I think we are through the hard part and I am so thankful. I have felt tired, unorganized, and a little frazzled this month. Izzy comes home from school daily with a million papers, with dates and functions and I have just felt overwhelmed and forgetful. Maybe this is the first day of getting back on our normal routine and I can get back to my usual organized self. I like that me much better.

Big Sister.

I have a brother. He is 3 1/2 years younger and being his big sister was a lot of work. My parents have told me that I was so severely shy as a toddler (hello Izzy) that they felt it was necessary to have another child to force me to be social. I hate to say it, but as children, we didn't get along so well. I am quick witted and more verbal and that frustrated him greatly. He couldn't quite get out what he wanted to and would end up hitting me instead. I felt like a mature old lady trapped in a little girls body while my brother was like a circus clown always ready to entertain and get the laugh. If there was a rule, I followed it and he broke it. If there was danger, I avoided it while he ran towards it. As we grew to teenagers, we fought more and avoided each other as much as possible.

There is one story from my childhood that completely wraps up our relationship. One snowy-school cancelled day, my brother and his boy neighbor friend and I and my girl neighbor friend decide to build the sweetest snow forts around. We all worked super hard on them and just as the girls side was almost perfected, my 10 year old brother Jarrod, arrogantly walks over to inspect our work. I believe there was some trash talking exchanged and then my brother did the unthinkable! He kicked down our snow fort! Laughing hysterically, he walks back to his fort with attitude. I was not going to let him win so easily, so I walk to his fort, and return the favor ( in the most lady-like way possible.) Just as I am lifting my leg to damage his beloved fort, he picks up the metal snow shovel and threatens that if I EVEN think about it, he will hit me with the shovel. Pssssh, whatever! I slightly move my leg and the next thing I know I have a metal shovel coming at my face, but my brothers face showed everything. He had slipped and didn't mean to actually follow through with his threats, but actually hit me. I stood there for a minute, not feeling anything, but when I noticed our friends faces and the fact that my brother had quickly turned a shade of green, I knew something was wrong. I look down, to find myself standing in a few inches of red snow. My brother screamed and I took off running into the house. I had no idea where I was actually bleeding from, but the massive amounts of blood had completely freaked me out. I make it into my parents bedroom, my Dad sees my face and screams JARRRRRRRRROOOODDD! Now, doesn't that say everything? Couldn't I have slipped and hurt myself? He didn't even ask, he just started screaming at my brother! Apparently, when Jarrod slipped, the shovel turned so the blade was vertical and caught from the inside of my lip and cut open-down from my chin and neck. I was rushed to the emergency room and was quickly put back together. Amazingly, I have no scar from that incident. My brother felt horrible, and I knew he didn't intend to actually hurt me. This story, paved the way for many a guilt trip. If I ever needed anything, I just mention the shovel and I see the same face I did when he was 10 years old.

Jarrod and I are all grown up now, but our personalities are still the same. Jarrod is fun and free like the wind. I am all OCD and responsible. The difference now, we get along really well. I enjoy spending time with him and I think he is one of the funniest people I know. I guess, as a child, I felt responsible for him. I felt like I always had to clean up his messes and now, I can just enjoy him. Silly, fun Jarrod turned out to be a fantastic Uncle. My kids adore him. Who will play sword fights at 10 a.m? Uncle Jarrod will. Who enjoys watching kids movies just as much as my kids? Uncle Jarrod. Who is willing to babysit on a Friday night instead of hanging out with his own friends, even if it means changing diapers and putting 2 kids to bed on his own? My brother Jarrod. Right now, Uncle Jarrod is visiting. My Dad just installed the most gigantic TV in the basement and Jarrod and Izzy are laid out in recliners watching a kids movie while eating ice cream on a Sunday afternoon.

As much as I wished I would have been an only child as a kid, I am so glad I am not. Jarrod ended up being a very good brother and he makes me lighten up a bit. I am really thankful for that because when I see how my kids light up when he walks in, it makes me want to be a little more silly too.

Pee Pee Pants

Today was a fantastic day! Hubby was home from school at 12 and we spent our surprise family day at the park. The weather was beautiful, my boys were full of giggles and Hubby and I couldn't stop exchanging smiles while watching our babies play. Asher is officially at park age, he can climb, loves to swing and most of all loves to chase Izzy around. Things were going great and then, being the people watcher I am, I noticed a couple.

Please forgive my judgemental thoughts before I go any further, but trust me, you would have thought the same. =)

So, couple in detail: Mom was dressed like Deborah in Everybody Loves Raymond. Jeans and a cardigan. Cute hair and overall nice looking. Dad was extremely large, dressed in a black Harley Davidson t-shirt and jeans. At first, I didn't think they were together because they were that couple that you just say- Really? How did they end up together? Son was approximately Izzy's age 4'ish and he was dressed in a long sleeved polo and jeans. That is when I noticed...his jeans were completely wet. Son had peed his pants. I saw this kid in passing and noticed the obviously soaked pants and wondered, where are this kids parents and how have they not noticed his pants when I did in .5 seconds? That is when I put the family together. Cardigan, Harley and Pee Pee pants are a family. Huh? My next thought, if parents are that out of it that they don't notice, why is a 4 year old not telling someone. The look on his face was as if he had never been to a park before, he was dripping with excitement...well that and pee.

Right about that time is when I pushed my jaw shut with my hand. I stood there watching this family play and pushing each other on the swings. The swings my little clean Izzy was just on. I couldn't keep my thoughts quiet any longer. I shared the situation with Hubby and he was equally as grossed out. Luckily, we were at the end of our park day anyway and headed out.

Now I am a mother and completely sympathetic that children have accidents and honestly I felt badly for him. What I couldn't understand is why his seemingly normal and mismatched parents, didn't share the same concern for him or all of the other children that will touch and play on the same toys their urine soaked son just contaminated? This is the word that kept coming out of my mouth- "Sick!"

I expect parks to be germ filled, but urine was not on my list of things to look out for. Which reminds me of another instance at a park. Earlier this summer, while Izzy and I were swinging, a boy about 7 or 8 was running around playing on toys entirely too small for his age. The kid stops for a second looks right at us and just PUKES right on the playground. I believe he had just had entirely too much candy b/c the color was something unnatural. Not sure where this kids parents were, but what did pukey do after he cleared his system? Went right back to playing like it is a completely normal process.

Which begs my question...WHAT IS WRONG WITH PARENTS?

Needless to say, we will be playing in the backyard a whole lot more. =)

Sweets

Not the candy kind...the kind only my little babies can bring. I took some pics of my gorgeous little boys today playing in the leaves and enjoying a beautiful day. Every mother is completely biased and think their children are the most perfect and amazing creations. I am no different. I fall in love every single time my little lovey bats his pretty eyes at me, or Izzy says something so sweet I almost shut down in a sugar coma.

For instance, the other day we were snuggling in my bed and Izzy was feeling like he wasn't getting quite enough snuggle. Suddenly, he sits up really tall and says, "Don't worry Mommy, God made me with two arms, one to snuggle you and one to snuggle my Ashie."

*tears*

Where does this kid come up with this stuff? His future wife better look out, because she will not be able to stay mad at him. He is like a constant compliment 24/7.

At least 6 times today he came up to Asher and I separately and told us "I just love you really really much."

When we were outside taking pictures, I told Izzy to look at his brother so I could take a profile picture of both of them. Without prompting, they looked at each other, grinned really big and Asher gave him a kiss. I almost couldn't hold back the tears! It is just unbelievable to me at this age how much they adore each other.

Taking those pictures made my entire day. I am sure the day will come, where it isn't all kisses and giggles and I can look back at this picture and close my eyes and remember how much they really do love each other. But, I am going to do everything I can to keep it looking like this, because this is how it is supposed to be.

There is a new Sherriff in town.

There is so many things I need to post about from this weekend. I am so behind. Lets start with the one that is affecting me currently. I am the new CFO of the household. Major, right?

Hubby is so swamped with Med school that he asked that I take over the finances. I have been very hesitant because Hubby and I are much different in our financial personalities. We are both of the mindset that if you don't have it, you don't spend it...cash only. That philosophy has saved us much heart ache and I am so thankful we started out that way, or we wouldn't be able to make it in our current situation. However, we are much different in how we would spend the money we have. We both like nice things, but I am super-duper like don't spend a $1.00 because it makes me want to throw up-frugal and he is more-oh there is a new version of what I have that works totally fine, but that is new and I must have it immediately-spender. When Hubby and I first married, I did the finances, but I loved him oh so dearly and I wanted him to have anything he asked for. The guilt and pressure was literally making me sick, so I turned it over to him. He has done a fantastic job for about 8 years now and I have been worried about taking it back over, but I also know he just doesn't have the time.

Over the weekend, we spent a couple of hours going over all of our accounts, our budget, bills and even our Christmas budget. Everything has been turned over to me, I am in charge. Now I get to make all of the decisions on where the money goes and I do like that feeling, but then I realize I like to see a certain number on our balance...and I am the type of person that will figure out a way to keep it there. Even today, I went to the grocery store and got several items for the kids lunches and snacks and a few dinner items. Nothing fancy, all necessary but it totalled $55.00. For some reason, when Hubby did the books, that didn't hurt so much. But now it is on me, and it stung even though it is a totally reasonable amount. So what does this say about me? Well, I can keep on a budget no matter what. I am the perfect person for the job and there is a reason God put me with my hubby for the road we are taking in life. We have to be realistic and budgeted. I can totally do that. I just hope I actually still enjoy little things here and there, because why go to the bounce house for $7 when you can play at a mall play land for free? Right I know, I think I might need some medication....it is really that bad. Every dollar counts to me and that is why I had to turn it over to Hubby in the first place..it hurts too badly to spend money for things even when it is necessity. When I was young, my parents would give us allowance each week. What did I do with mine? Save it. I would wait, for Birthdays or Christmas or school shopping to get new clothes. I mean what teenager does stuff like that? On CFO day #1, Hubby asked for something for his car and I actually enjoyed saying, "Sorry it isn't in the budget." So wrong, I know!

Then, I think although I know it is a little over the top, I am really glad I have that trait now. Everyone seems to be struggling right now and I know how to stretch a dollar. This is all my Grandmas fault anyway. I get this from her. She probably has millions of dollars stashed behind her bedroom walls and yet she takes sugar and ketchup packets from restaurants and saves them so she doesn't have to buy those items. Someone do an intervention when I get to that point...please!

I am the new CFO of the house, and Hubby, I expect your expense reports on my desk Monday bright and early!!

6:59

There is a new rule in my house I like to call it the "Mommy can function rule." Izzy is not allowed out of his bed (potty is the exception) until 7:00 a.m. Apparently, this boy got my Dads genes. Let me give you a small glimpse into my life as a child. My Dad can wake up at 4:00 a.m. singing like he is Mary Poppins. Did he care that maybe the rest of the house might have a few more hours of wonderful and much needed sleep? No! Why? Because he is a natural early riser. This makes me think just how early is he going to start waking up when he is 70? He is going to have dinner at like 2 in the afternoon...anyway I digress. Back to Izzy. Izzy has been waking up at 5:30. I could barely type that because I did not get my dads early rising genes and that doesn't even feel like a real time. For the last couple of weeks Izzy comes in our room as quiet as a mouse, uses our bathroom and then I can feel him hot breathing me. I can't like this routine at all. I keep my eyes closed and wait him out. Finally he heads back downstairs to his room...so I thought. Turns out, he has been going to my parents room, and watching cartoons. Um, that isn't going to work for me. No wonder he is grouchy at Noon!

Last night, we are all sitting at dinner and I explain the new rule. The "You are not allowed out of your bed for any reason unless the house is on fire or you have to potty rule". The consequence to such a major morning disaster? No TV for the entire day. Ouch, that one hurts. I remember getting grounded from TV as a child and thinking "This day will never end!"

So how did this morning go? He came upstairs to potty at 6:30, then returned to his room. I heard the baby crying at 6:59 and went to Izzy's room to release him into the new day. He was sitting on his bed in a complete pout. I said, "Good Morning, Love, what is wrong?" Izzy- "I am so sad, because 7:00 takes a long time. Look, it has said 6:59 forever. ( I am sure he thinks that because he can't tell time yet.)" As he is showing me, it turns to 7:00, and he jumps up and down and says "Good Morning Mommy! I have been waiting a long time to say that to you!!!!"

He followed the rules, so Max and Ruby, you are safe for another day.

How did the baby who slept from 7:30p-10:30a every single day turn into the 4 year old who wakes up before the birds?

Upside down

After Izzy's Parent/Teacher conference, I could see the areas that he really needed to practice and numbers was one of them. He can count pretty high for his age, but has a problem recognizing the numbers by sight. After just a couple of days of practice with a numbers puzzle, he know all of his numbers with confidence except 6 and 9. When it gets to these numbers, he takes a long pause and then just starts guessing. So I tried to think creatively and give him something to remember like 9 stands on its tail and 6 stands on its circle. Last night Marcus and I helped him with this again for about an hour and he is such a perfectionist, he wouldn't let us stop until he got it perfect. Finally, it was bedtime and I just had to make him let it go. I promised we would practice again tonight and he would eventually get them right. As I am tucking him in, he says, "Mommy, I don't like those upside down things." (After a few minutes of questioning, I realize he means #6 and 9) "I don't like them because they are too hard. We should just throw them in the trash anyway because I think they are broken. Then I would know all of my numbers!"

Oh if life was just that simple. If only we could just toss away the things that give us a little trouble!

We are going to keep up the hard work, and hopefully soon he can feel proud of himself for accomplishing a task that didn't naturally come easily to him. Until then, anyone have any tips so I don't find poor #6 and 9 in the trash can? =)

The Paper Warehouse Ban.

My Mom asked me to bring the boys in costume to her work Friday. The boys were dressed as Mario and Luigi and were the cutest things ever! As we were heading to Grandmas office, we had a mustache malfunction and since this is a crucial part of the ensemble, we had to make it right. I thought we would make a quick run into Paper Warehouse to get a new sticky mustache and we would be on our way. OH how I was wrong.

Izzy is sensitive and he is especially sensitive to things he thinks are "ugly". We are very careful about what we allow him to see and hear and if he feels a show is too "ugly" he will come have me change it. Izzy is his own monitor and I really appreciate that about him. He has noticed that a few houses were decorated with ghosts and scary pumpkins and he let me know that he didn't really appreciate those particular neighbors choice of decor. Obviously, I hadn't thought this shopping trip out, b/c if he was frightened by a carved pumpkin at Noon, a store 1/2 filled with spooky characters and scary masks was not the store for him.

However, I didn't realize my mistake, until after I asked for assistance so I could just grab the mustache and head out. I went down an aisle filled with wigs, makeup and didn't realize that the other side was masks. Suddenly, I hear a child with a shrill scream that would make you think they were being kidnapped....then I realized that it was MY child screaming at the opposite end of the aisle. He refused to take another step and was completely hysterical. I grabbed the mustache that was directly in front of me, but I was not quick enough. Israel had completely lost all control and was hyperventilating, screaming, and was in a complete state of panic. The store clerk, yelled down the aisle, "I am going to grab him and get him a balloon." I was behind her, but had to make up the length of the aisle between us and on my walk of shame back, I noticed all of the judgemental looks from mothers. (Why are we so mean to each other? That is another post.) As I am turning the corner, I hear my sweet, scared son say "YOU ARE A STRANGER AND I DO NOT WANT TO GET IN YOUR CARRRRRRRRRR!" Suddenly, this bad trip had turned into what he felt was a kidnapping situation. Could I traumatize my child anymore in 5 minutes? I finally get to the counter and hug him and apologize that he is scared and promise we are leaving right away when he says to the clerk, "Lady, I'm sorry, but I HATE your store. It is too ugly for me and I am never coming back here." She tried to change his mind, but he wasn't having it. Even 2 free balloons didn't do it. I quickly paid and put my boys in the car to head to Grandmas, all the while thinking, knowing Izzy, how did I not see that coming? I felt horrible for him and felt so guilty. I don't ever want my children to be scared and I think it is super important to keep your children innocent for as long as possible. Izzy and I had a long talk on the way to Grandmas and I told him that all of that stuff is fake and there is nothing to be scared of and he gave me a serious warning..."Mommy, this is your last chance. If you EVER take me to that scary store again, I will be so MAD at you!"

Paper Warehouse is officially banned from Fall shopping. Thank goodness, their birthdays are both in the summer.